[Be-Ahavah U-Be-Emunah – Vayechi
5773 – translated by R. Blumberg]
How
marvelous is the modesty of the Jewish woman! What nobility and glory, purity and
holiness it demonstrates! What great honor is shown to the soul when we conceal
our bodies. That is the essence of man. What great gentleness and humility it
demonstrates! (Maharal, Netivot Olam, Netiv HaTzeniyut). What a great blessing
it holds! What great spirituality! “All the glory of the king’s daughter is
internal. Her raiment is of checkered work, wrought with gold” (Tehilim 45:14).
How modest and holy were our mothers down through the generations, in every
time and place.
Principles
of Modesty
1.
Clothing must cover the body. 2. It mustn’t be transparent. 3. It mustn’t be
snug. 4. It must be sedate and restrained.
Transparency
is
measured against the sun or against a bright light, and not inside a house.
Non-snug
clothing means
clothing that conceals the shape of the body and does not accentuate any body
part even briefly. For example, some examine skirt width by lifting a leg up
onto a chair. Some weaves are problematic: thick or thin knits, lycra and
tricot.
Color: One must
avoid the following colors: 1) red 2) skin color 3) bold shades of orange,
yellow or green 4) gold, silver or shiny fabric.
One may
expose one’s throat but not one’s torso. Therefore, one must cover 1) the sides
of the neck, up to the point where the slant of the body ends; 2) the back of
the neck, up to the first vertebrae; 3) the front of the neck up to where the
bones protrude. Certainly one must close one’s top button in one’s shirt, and
all the better to wear a turtleneck.
Sleeves
must reach below the elbow under all circumstances. They mustn’t be too wide.
Raising the arms or other movements cause the upper arms to be revealed unless
the sleeves are snug and close fitting. The best is to wear sleeves to the end
of the arm.
Dresses
and Skirts. Dresses
have to fall ten centimeters below the knee. Some insist on opaque stockings as
well, or that the skirt or dress should come all the way down. With opaque
stockings, the skirt, as noted, has to be ten centimeters below the knee (the
thickness of stockings should be 40 denier, but due to a change in production
more is required).
Obviously,
the skirt should not be snug or tight. Rather, it should be ten centimeters
wider than the body’s circumference at its widest part, and in the area of the
knee, 50 centimeters more than the circumference there. Slits below the knee
are forbidden as well, because they draw attention. Slits must therefore be
closed up using fabric of the same color as the skirt, or otherwise not
standing out. One should not wear a skirt closed with buttons, due to various
problems (buttons falling off or opening, or exposure through the openings).
Rather, skirts should close with a zipper. With shirts, as well, one should be
careful regarding spaces between buttons being too large.
Shoes. 1) Shoes
should not be in bold or uncommon colors. 2) One should not wear narrow high
heels that affect the way one walks. 3) The design should be gentle, and 4) not
loud. (see Yeshayahu’s vision about the Daughters of Zion, who “walk with mincing
gait, making a tinkling with their feet” -- Yeshayahu 3:16).
Hairdos
for Unmarried Women:
Some authorities insist on hair being kept bound in a pony tail and shorter
than shoulder length, while others say it needn’t be bound that way, but that
it still should not be left wild and unkempt. Braids are a fine choice.
Hair
Coverings:
Some authorities forbid married women to wear a wig, and some permit it, albeit
insisting that the wig should be modest and restrained, and not
attention-getting.
Some
insist on covering all the hair, while some allow revealing a handbreadth,
i.e., 4 centimeters, the width of two fingers.
Educating
Girls to Be Modest:
Some say that such training begins at age three, while others say it begins at
about age six (five to seven). (Sources: Sefer Gan Na’ul by the author).
How fortunate we are that the spiritual
longing for modesty is on the rise.
