Shut SMS #28

Rabbi Shlomo Aviner answers hundreds of text message questions a week. Some appear in the parashah sheets "Ma'ayanei Ha-Yeshu'ah," "Olam Ha-Katan" and "Be-Ahavah U-Be-Eumnah." Here's a sample:
Q: If I am set up on a date and it does not work out, is it Lashon Ha-Ra for me to tell the person
who set us up what bothered me in order to find a more suitable match in the future?
A: No. It is also a kindness to the person who suggested it in order for him or her to know.
Q: Should I recite Shehechiyanu on new eyeglasses?
A: If you are happy.
Q: My husband's parents are pressuring us about something and threatening to cut relations.
What should we do?
A: A man therefore leaves his father and mother and cleaves to his wife.
Q: Is a shirt with "Hashem is the King" holy?
A: Yes. It requires two coverings in the bathroom.
Q: I am a Religious-Zionist. Is it permissible for me to belittle Ultra-Orthodox Rabbis?
A: G-d forbidden. You should certainly honor them but follow your Rabbis.
Q: Is it permissible for me to give out food samples at a store when people may not recite a blessing because of "Do not put a stumbling block before the blind"?
A: It is permissible, since maybe they will recite a blessing and it is for a livelihood.
Q: My uncle married a non-Jew and they are having a circumcision by a doctor for their son. Is it permissible to attend? If I do not attend they will be insulted.
A: Do not go. It gives legitimacy. They do not have a monopoly on being insulted – we are also insulted by his action.
Q: Is it permissible to listen to songs with Torah verses while I daven?
A: No. One must daven with a trembling of holiness.
Q: Do I have to give ma'aser from money from babysitting?
A: Yes, from all income.
Q: I have gone out with a young man a few times but it is always on my initiative. Should I continue?
A: Yes. While it is a shortcoming on his part that he does not take the initiative, a person is judged by the majority of his actions. It is worthwhile to talk to him about it.
Q: Is there value in visiting "Kivrei Tzadikim"(the graves of the righteous)?
A: Yes, but Torah learning and acts of kindness are preferable.
Q: How can we hide our heads in the sand and say that everything is fine in the State and army?!
A: You are correct, everything is not fine, but everything is also not bad. We rejoice and strengthen that which is good and are hurt over that which is not good and try to fix it.