Shut SMS #22

Rabbi Shlomo Aviner answers hundreds of text message questions a week. Some appear in the parashah sheets "Ma'ayanei Ha-Yeshu'ah" and "Olam Ha-Katan." Here's a sample:
Q: What is the halachic problem with boys growing long hair?
A: There are three Torah prohibitions: 1. It is an impediment between one's head and Tefillin, and it causes a blessing recited in vain when putting on Tefillin. 2. Following the ways of the non-Jews (which includes acts of conceit and haughtiness). 3. "Lo Tilbash" (the prohibition of men dressing or appearing as women).
Q: I am 16 years old and I have begun a relationship with a boy and I am concerned that it will develop into something more serious. What is Ha-Rav's opinion about having a boyfriend at this age?
A: Since you are not at a marriageable age for a few years, it is certainly not appropriate. See Kitzur Shulchan Aruch of Ha-Rav Shlomo Ganzfried 152:8-9.
Q: Is it permissible to watch a movie which shows a woman wearing short sleeves? For example, if I watch a comedy because it is funny and not to see the woman.
A: Try not to look at her.
Q: I am taking a lot of exams now and feel great pressure that I will fail. I cry a lot and am in despair. Is this a lack of faith?
A: This is not a lack of faith since it is not against Hashem. But it is always good to recite Tehillim.
Q: Is it an obligation to keep on one's Tefillin during a Dvar Torah after davening? At yeshiva, is it respectful to remove my Tefillin when the Rosh Yeshiva is giving a Dvar Torah?
A: Is it not an obligation. You have to ask the Rosh Yeshiva since there are different opinions.
Q: Is it permissible to eat a sandwich in the street? How about an ice cream?
A: No, just as it is forbidden to eat in the market. Eat on the side.
Q: If a Tzahal soldier is killed by friendly fire, do we still say Hy"d (Hashem Yinkom Damo – May Hashem revenge his blood – as we do for Jews killed by non-Jews)?
A: We should say it, since it occurred because of our enemies.
Q: Is it permissible to have my two year old wear tzitzit even though he is still in diapers?
A: It is permissible. After all, an adult also wears tzitzit in the bathroom.
Q: Is there an obligation to give Tzedakah to anyone who asks?
A: Only if they prove that they are poor. 90% of them are charlatans.
Q: Is it permissible to charge a cell phone in shul?
A: It is permissible; the amount of money involved for the use of the electricity is negligible. Some authorities say it is forbidden because of respect for a shul.
Q: If I am given a counterfeit coin in a store, can I use it?
A: No, only in that store.
Q: My good friend is marrying a non-Jew, and if I do not attend the wedding, she will be offended.
A: It is certainly forbidden to attend. We do not strengthen those who are transgressing. Perhaps she may be hurt, but those transgressing do not have a monopoly on being offended.
Q: Is it preferable to daven with a minyan on a train or on my own afterwards?
A: With a minyan.
Q: If I am full, should I eat what is left in order to prevent "Bal Tashchit" (wanton destroying)?
A: No. "Bal Tashchit" of the body is more important.
Q: Do mitzvot between people, such as honoring mother and father, require "kavannah" (proper intention)?
A: They have great value even without proper intention.